Saturday, October 14, 2006
everytime i wanna start on my applications.. this sense of loss will come over me. although i keep telling God that i will cast all my worries unto Him and rest in faith.. i still cant stop thinking about it. I dunno if thinking means i have not let go.. but i really want to place all my trust in Him.
just as i sumitted my UCAS a couple of days ago.. kathryn just told me yesterday that i shouldnt apply manchester leeds and glasgow cos they dun have dental school for international students in 2007-2008. Great! among four of my uk choices that i sumitted.. three of them are the above mentioned.
When i first see the message.. i really felt like giving up. Everything that i am doing to get me into dentistry seems to not going the right way. somewhere somehow the roads are cut off. i really dunno why am i so insistent. It really seems as if God is telling me this is the way i should not go. so i asked Him. i dunno if its the Holy Spirit talking to me.. cos i still dunno how to differentiate the Holy Spirit and my own random thoughts. but somehow.. my mind says:
why do you only see the three that are taken away from you? you are not honouring God by thinking like this. Concentrate on the only one left and thank God for it! He hasnt removed all your choices! One is all you need anyway and He left you with the one with scholarship.. praise God for it!
i believe what pastor prince said: "all things are working for your good. good or bad."
Actually i have to admit that im not a regular in church.. but everytime i go is because i just have that immense urge to be there. and everytime the service ends.. i know why i am there. cos so happenly.. pastor prince will be talking about issues troubling me.. and everytime i leave new creation.. i feel different. that's why im walking closer to God.
and today as i opened my mail from minling.. right at the bottom.. it wrote: "if God brings you to it.. He will bring you though it." and it immediately brought tears to my eyes.
so now that i have done my part.. i shall rest in faith. Cos only when i rest can God work.
pastor prince said something like this:" let go!! its just like a hose.. if u keep holding tight to it.. water cannot flow to you! the supply is always there but it cannot reach you cos u refuse to let go! its the same for His blessings.. the supply has never cease but u have to let go in order to recieve it."
this particular sermon on "live a let go life" is still available on new creation's website i think. everyone should listen to it! pastor prince is really good =)
says me`8:56 PM
